Thursday, April 12, 2007

Dead to Me #2 Mike Nifong



I guess we should really blame O.J. Simpson. I mean, anyone who read this blog regularly knows he murdered basketball for me. However, O.J. is also responsible for bringing that nimrod Judge Lance Ito in my life. Ito was the first working judge to really become a household name when he allowed cameras into his courtroom and turned a murder trial into reality TV. Since then there have been myriad wannabe famous judges prosecutors and lawyers that have tried to turn their cases into fame and fortune for themselves. The latest loser?

Mike Nifong

If you have been living under a rock for the last year or so Mike Nifong brought an indictment against three Duke University lacrosse players for allegedly assaulting a stripper they brought to a fraternity party. I won't mention the names of the players because these guys have been harmed enough and they certainly don't need me bringing more attention to them. However Mike Nifong, assclown of the year, smeared these boys in the press, to their families and to the general public. He painted them as monsters, predators and everything that is wrong with college sports.

The problem? It was all a lie.

Mike Nifong had NO case. There was no evidence. The complaining witness was not even remotely credible. Did Mike Nifong care? Nope. He saw fame and fortune and who the hell cared if he ruined the lives of three people to do it. They were rich kids anyway, they would survive.

Today, to add insult to egrigious injury, Mike Nifong apologized to the boys today, after North Carolina Attorney General Roy Cooper dropped all charges yesterday and proclaimed the boys innocent and Nifong a rogue. I tried to pull up a copy of the written apology, but for some reason I could not find a working link. In reality it doesn't matter what he said, how could it possibly help.

Mike Nifong will most likely be disbarred for his behavior and that is good. He will also probably spend the rest of his life paying off the judgement these three young men will win against him in civil court. If I was the State of North Carolina and the County of Durham I would write a big fat check now and save everyone the pain and embarrassment of the lawsuit.

Mike Nifong, dead to me for all time.

No 1 of Consequence

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Running with, what the hell was that about??



Running With Scissors is a movie based on the personal memoir of a man named Augusten Burroughs. I am going to spoil part of this movie for you if you haven't seen it. If you have, then feel free to commiserate with me in the comments section.

The movie, essentially is about Augusten's search for a normal childhood which is stolen from him because his alcoholic father leaves and his psychotic mother dumps him on her shrink. Augusten and the shrink's wife form a relationship and the payoff of the movie is her showing him a mother's love as he jaunts off into the world. Sound sweet?

There are a couple of major problems in this movie. Every commercial, every preview and everything I saw marketing this movie billed it as a comedy. It is NOT funny. It is not even remotely funny. There are a couple of moments that make you smile and some comedic depictions of insanity, but make no mistake, this is a dramatic film. It pisses me off when I am so misled by a movie's advertising. The comedic marketing of this film was a cheap manipulation and it sapped my enjoyment.

The cast is top notch and the acting is superior, so watching it, while irritating, was not excruciating. The irritating part is the climax of the movie is a culmination of Augusten's relationship with Agnes, the shrink's wife. However aside from a single scene starring Hamburger Helper the movie never delves into the relationship in a substiantive way. Why does Agnes love Augusten? I am still not sure.

The book may enrich the plot points that are so egrigiously missing from the movie and the story is mildly compelling so if I ever get a chance to read for pleasure in the near future I might pick it up. Now that you know what to expect I can say Running With Scissors is worth watching, but don't expect a comedy, you will not get one.

No 1 of Consequence

UPDATE: I wrote this last night when I was ridiculously tired and couldn't sleep. Re-reading it this morning tells me I should NEVER do that again. I won't delete it, but be aware I know it sucks.

15 years without laughter



When I was a boy I listened to stand up comedy. Many nights I would fall asleep to the sounds of Eddie Murphy, Billy Crystal, Robin Williams and many others. Then, around the time I was 14 or 15 I heard a guy named Sam Kinison. He was so raucous, imaginative and over the top I was completely blown away. He made me laugh almost every time I heard him speak. I waited on line at Sam Goody to buy his new albums the day they were released and I listened to them until I could recite them in my sleep. 15 years ago today he was killed on the road to Las Vegas by a drunk driver. An ironic death considering Sam's hard drinking and drugging lifestyle, but a tragic one nonetheless. Sam brought political correctness to its knees during his day and in a world that thinks Dane Cook is the funniest guy around I find myself missing Sam's raw observations more and more.

No 1 of Consequence

Monday, April 09, 2007

Code or Censorship

From the New York Times

I find it interesting that blogging has become so prolific that people are sitting around discussing ways to make it nicer. Even if some community of bloggers comes up with a comprehensive code of behavior who is to say who will sign on to it and who won’t. Some people allow anonymous comments (me) and some don’t. I don’t really care what anyone says about me or anything I write. I welcome dissension and argument. If somebody posts something I don’t agree with I will just ignore them. If they post something I find offensive I will just delete their comment. If I stumble upon a blog I don’t find savory or palatable I won’t go back there. I am not sure I need a codified blogger standard to guide me. I apply my own filters to the world. I think most bloggers are capable of doing that.

No 1 of Consequence